i just google imaged poop.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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