Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize