I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
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