someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize