Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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