Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize