Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize