hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize