i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize