FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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