I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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