I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I think my vagina is haunted
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize