i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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