I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize