You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
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I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
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40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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