You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize