I cut my penus on the lid.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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