I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
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For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
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I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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