Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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