so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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