You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize