Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize