My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize