I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
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Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
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I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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