just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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