Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
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if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
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