Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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