so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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