He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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