it was like eating out sand paper
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Slut skills are useful in every country.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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