you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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