It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize