they need to just BURY HIM!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
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I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
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I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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