You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Green mimosas i think yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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