Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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