yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
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He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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