which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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