When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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