roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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