You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
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so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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