$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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