used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize