Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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