How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
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