I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Rumble strips road head = magical
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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