She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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