Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize