You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
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No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You need a sexual gate keeper
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
whose parrot is this?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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