i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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