Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
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